Category: The Fullfilment Framework

5 Books to help you get your life on track

Achieving Goals, Happiness, Success, The Fullfilment Framework

“Books are the training weights of the mind.”

-Epictetus

 

Books, it has been said, are windows into the soul and the doorways into dreams, but they also have the function by which we broaden our minds, sharpening our intellect and help ourselves live better lives. They are signposts on the path to happiness, success and fulfilment, the ingredients of a life well lived. These are 5 books that I believe will lead to a life well lived. They span the categories of health, self-improvement and spirituality. All three of these categories relate to the Foundation in my Fullfilment Framework, which is an evolving framework which I believe will lead to living a fulfilled life. (You can click on the titles of the books to take you to Amazon should you wish to buy a copy, though there are many other excellent online outlets where you could buy the books).

 

1. Start With Why, How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone To Take Action by Simon Sinek

 

“There are many ways to motivate people to do things, but loyalty comes from the ability to inspire people. Only when the WHY is clear and when people believe what you believe can a true loyal relationship develop.”

 

I am going to begin with Start With Why, an excellent book for figuring out your own ‘Why’, whether as an individual or as a company. Our ‘Why’ is our purpose, our reason for being, it is the thing that is behind every decision we make and every action we take, it is an essential part of our mind, body and soul. Our ‘Why’ is formed by the time we are in our early 20s, but many of us do not know what it is, or we do but we do not understand it well enough to utilise it in making a fulfilled life for ourselves. It is only now in my mid-thirties that I have figured out my ‘Why’, which is to help others be fulfilled in their lives. My Why is the motivation I use when at work, at church, with friends or with family, it is also the reason I have begun writing this blog.

This book takes us through the world that does not start with Why and the consequences of it. It then goes on to talk about the biology of our human brains and how the concept of Why is in harmony with our biology. It then goes on to discuss the successes various famous people and companies have had because they know their ‘Why’. The book is an excellent introduction to the concept of having a Why and it will help you figure out what your Why is, so you can align your life with it.

 

2. The Motivation Manifesto by Brendon Burchard

 

“We must ask: When will we be ready to ascend to another level of existence.”

 

This book is about focusing your life for success. It begins with ‘The Declaration of Personal Power.’ It is about reclaiming our sense of self and channeling our energy into self renewal and success in our lives. Section One in the book looks at our human nature and how we are affected by freedom, fear and motivation. We have conditioned responses to each of these, but if we were to take control of our responses then we can be free, courageous and generate our own motivation.

Section Two goes through a list of nine declaration on what we shall do, for example, “We Shall Reclaim Our Agenda” and “We Shall Defeat Our Demons.” These declaration empower us to be in the driving seat of our lives so that we can make our lives magnificent. This is something we can all do, every single one of us.

 

3. Healing Foods, Eat Your Way to a Healthier Life by Neal’s Yard Remedies

 

“The food we eat has an overreaching effect on our health and well-being, whether we are conscious of it or not.”

 

This book contains a wealth of knowledge about how food can be used to heal and to help us live a healthy life. It begins with different dietary patterns and diversity from around the world. It compares GM foods to food the way nature intended (organic) and it goes through the benefits of supplements. The main body if the book is an extensive look at the foods that heal. The food types are divided into Fruits, Vegetables, Nuts, Seeds and Sprouts, Medicinal Herbs, Culinary Herbs, Cereals and Grains, Pulses, Spices, Fats and Oils, Fermented Foods, Meats, Oily Fish and Other Foods. There is also a section with some wonderful Recipes That Heal and recipes set out into daily meals and types of foods. For a healthy body and a sense of well-being, our physical health is essential. Everything tat we eat and drink becomes our bodies, we are what we eat.

 

4. The Way of Qigong, The Art and Science of Chinese Energy Healing by Kenneth S. Cohen

 

“Qi is the Chinese word for “life energy.”… …Gong means “work” or “benefit acquired through perseverance and practice.” Thus, qigong means working with the life energy, learning how to control the flow and distribution of qi to improve the health and harmony of mind and body.”

 

Qigong is an ancient practice of generating and controlling the energy that flows through our bodies, which is a distinctly Eastern practice and a major part of Chinese medicine. In the Western model of medicine the focus is on treating the symptoms without trying to find the cause(s). I have experienced this first hand with my onset of Fibromyalgia. I went to see a variety of experts who could only see their specific section of the body and its functions, but having been treated by practitioners of Chinese medicine I can vouch for the fact that the focus is more on the whole body and fixing the cause of the illness, to bring the body back into balance.

This book firstly explains what Qigong is, its history and scientific evidence proving that it works. It then explains Qigong basics, ways of using Qigong to heal yourself and living a Qigong lifestyle. The book goes into a lot of depth, but explains everything in a way that makes sense and is easy to follow, with physical practices that are not very different from Tai Chi. In the West energy healing, or Qigong, is little known about, but it is slowly filtering into our culture in the same way that Martial Arts, Yoga and Tai Chi have done, it is only a matter of time.

 

 

5. Spiritual Renegade’s Guide to the Good Life by Lama Marut

 

“This book is for desperados. It’s for those who know life is short and who are tired of wasting day after day in low-level unhappiness as they wait for the next high-level version… …It’s a guide for those tired of trying to become well-adjusted to a perverse society and who are willing – even eager – to deviate from the norm.”

 

This book comes from a Buddhist standpoint, but it acknowledges the teachings of other world religions, and takes a common sense view of how to live a spiritual life, which, as every Prophet and Sage has taught, usually goes against the system. In our case it goes against the Capitalist culture we live in, which is designed to keep us unhappy, so we will keep buying things to keep the economy rolling on. Stepping off this hamster wheel and fighting the power by being content is the first step, because contentment is entry level happiness, the first step towards enlightenment, or perfect happiness.

What I like about this book is the short sections within each chapter which allow us to absorb the points made and practices suggested. There is also a Couch Potato Contemplation and an Action Plan at the end of each chapter. The Couch Potato Contemplation is something to reflect on from the chapter that you have just read, but rather than treating it like a serious meditation, it is something to just sit and think about while sat on the couch. The Action Plan is a behaviour to try and embody based on the teachings in the chapter we have just read, something simple but that challenges the status quo for the better. Each section also has a QR code that we can scan with our mobile phone, which takes us to YouTube Videos of Lama Marut giving teachings related to the section we have just read, to embed the learning and explore the ideas presented.

 

There is a Recommended Reading List on my blog site that has these books and many others under the categories:

  • Happiness, Health and Success
  • Theology and Philosophy
  • History and Science
  • Fiction

 

 

Resources

 

YouTube Channel of Dr John Bergman, who talks about how to achieve good health naturally without chemicals like medication.

YouTube Channel of Lama Marut, a Buddhist Lama who teaches deep Buddhist teachings in easy to understand lectures.

Website of Jim MacRitchie, a Qigong Acupuncturist who teaches Qigong classes (There are free Qigong resources on this website).

Website of Simon Sinek, discussing the concept of ‘Why’ and resources to use this concept to improve your life and that of others.

2017 goals achieved? How to set 2018 goals.

Achieving Goals, The Fullfilment Framework

“A goal properly set is halfway reached.”

—Zig Ziglar

 

It has come to the end of 2017, have you achieved all that you wanted to this year? Did you set goals this time last year that went undone? We often set unrealistic goals or we set achievable goals but do not put into place the habits and targets we need to achieve them. I will set out 5 steps that will help you achieve your goals for 2018.

 

Step 1: Decide on what you goal is going to be.

 

The first step is an obvious but crucial one, to make a decision on what you want to achieve and then deciding to act on this. This decision, however, needs to be made in the full conviction that you will achieve it. No half measures, no self doubt. Decision with conviction is the first and vital step to making positive change in your life.

 

Step 2: Reverse engineer the path to the goal.

 

Without a plan, or a map, to get you from where you are today to where you will be when you have achieved your goal, you can waste time doing unnecessary things by getting caught up in activities or strategies that do not help progress you towards your goal. This is wasted energy and time and this can have a negative impact on your motivation to continue, because you might begin to question whether it is worth it after all. So, start from having the goal achieved and work back through the steps that you would need to take to get there. Ask yourself what are the key actions that you will need to take. Ask what is the key knowledge and experience that you will need to have. Ask what key support you will need from mentors, family members and friends. We all need support sometimes, we cannot do everything alone. Ask what costs there will be and how you will finance the achieving of this goal. Finally, ask what habits you will need to have in order to work towards this goal. This will all give you a road map from where you are now to where you will be when you have achieved the goal.

Top Tip:

A short cut to achieving a goal is to find someone who is a high performer in the area you want to achieve in that has reached this goal themselves and find out the steps that they took to get there.

 

Step 3: Set daily, weekly and monthly targets.

 

Once you have reverse engineered the necessary steps, knowledge and experience to achieve your goal you will need to set up regular targets to get you to your goal. These should include daily goals which build on the habits that you will need to have, for example, if your goal is to loose weight a daily target could be to complete a simple exercise routine before you start your day that takes 15 minutes. If this is done every day the impact over a year will be massive. Then set weekly targets, for example, you could create a diet plan that includes mainly healthy foods 6 days out of the week with 1 day as your cheat day when you can eat want you want as a rewards for being consistent the rest of the week. Then set a target for a set number of months. If the goal will take 1 year then set a target for every 3 months. This will allow you to keep on track and all of the little successes each day, week or month will keep you be motivated as well.

 

Step 4: Set reminders to check in on progress at the start of each month.

 

Setting a reminder in your calendar to check in on your progress, whether it is a paper one or a digital one on your mobile phone or computer, is very important. This allows you to assess where you are doing well and where you might need to improve or make changes on your journey to achieve your goal. I would suggest the 1st of every month would be a good time to do this. As we move through life we become more knowledgeable and experience bring with it wisdom that can help move you closer to your goal sooner. Reflecting on your progress on a regular basis will also help you stay motivated to keep going, because you can see how far you have come already and how well you are doing. This self-reflection should involve comparing what you have done so far to the targets you have set yourself and whether you have achieved them, and then making some notes on what has gone well and what changes you might need to make.

 

Step 5: Make yourself accountable to the targets and the goal.

 

This is a strategy that can really help you stay on track to achieve your goal. Find yourself someone who will hold you accountable on the progress towards your goal. It is best if this person is someone that you trust and you have a good relationship with, but not someone who will not be supportive or who will not push when you need to be pushed. Usually, it is a good idea to pick a relative or a friend who will support you and motivate you when you are struggling to keep going. This will be your Accountability Buddy.  Sharing with them your plan to achieve the goal and the daily, weekly and monthly targets you have set yourself is needed here, so they can keep tabs on how you are doing. I would suggest setting up times when you can get together or talk over the phone to reflect on how you are doing. I would suggest using the monthly reminder to reflect on your progress as a good time to do this. Once you have sat down yourself to self-reflect then share this with your Accountability Buddy and discuss what went well and how you could do better.

 

Final Thoughts

 

Setting goals can be a tricky business because we are often pressured by outside forces to make changes in our lives. This could be pressure from family and friends, from messages through the media on how we should live or act, and it could be pressures from our place of work. When we set goals they should reflect our inner drives, our reason for being. In short they should come from our ‘Why’. Finding out what our Why is will be the single most important thing you can do. We all have a Why, but many of us are not sure what it is.

Your Why is the motivation behind everything that you do, it is as I say, your reason for being. Mine is to help others find fulfilment in their lives. For others it might be to be an amazing sports person or to be the best parent they can be. If you are unsure how to figure out what your Why is then I recommend you read the book Start With Why by Simon Sinek, or watch his TED Talk “How Great Leaders Inspire Action” which summarises the main points of the book, this will bring clarity to your Why. There is a companion book called Find Your Why, which I have yet to read but this may help you find further clarity. You could also visit the website www.startwithwhy.com. Start with your Why and set your goals in line with it, that way you won’t achieve your goal and then find that it does not fulfill you as you thought it might when the goal was set. Checking out my Fullfilment Framework found on the menu of this blog site can also help on your journey to finding your Why and your Way, two essential components to living a fulfilled life.

The Good Health Triad: Good health is part of our Foundation

The Fullfilment Framework

“The first wealth is health.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

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The Fullfilment Project, and the Fullfilment Framework, are an evolving endeavour to better understand how to live a life that brings fulfilment, so I can pass on this knowledge to as many people as possible. While reviewing the Fullfilment Framework recently I realised that I had left out a key element, that of good health. If we do not have good health everything else, whether it be related to happiness or success, becomes more difficult. Health, therefore, should really form part of our Foundation, in addition to self knowledge and acquired wisdom.
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When we think of health there are different elements that need to be considered,  all of which fall into three pillars of good health; the pillars are mental and emotional health, physical health and energy health. I call these the Good Health Triad. The first two are well known and much can be found on these two pillars of health in books, videos and other online resources, but energy health is not so commonly referred to or known about. We all have an energy system that is well known about in the East, which refers to the movement of Chi (or Qi) around the body along the meridian lines. If our energy system is not functioning properly we become unwell. Chi needs to flow through us, but if there are energy blockages the Chi stagnates, if there is not enough Chi in the body, fatigue sets in and physical health declines.
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Mental and Emotional Health
Mental and emotional health, which includes how balanced our emotions are, influences our mindset, which the world filters through to our conscious and unconscious awareness. Emotions, like energy, come and go, but when negative emotions hang around for long periods of time this reduces our good mental and emotional health. If sadness becomes depression or pride becomes self importance we have negative results appearing in our lives. Our mental and emotional health is dependent on positive mindsets and positive environments. Our environments are key here, and this also includes our relationships. This is why we should choose our partner, our friends and our work colleagues carefully, they all, in part, form our support structure, as we form part of theirs. It can be very beneficial to seek support from trained Counsellor or Psychiatrist depending on your level of need. Be brave enough to seek support is essential to good mental and emotional health.
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Physical Health
Physical health is equally important. Anyone who has ever been sick with the flu, or a more serious illness, knows how debilitating it can be. The mind may be willing but an unwell body often is not. Our physical health is largely dependent on two things, our diet and our level of physical activity. Everything that we eat and drink literally becomes our physical body. The water we drink becomes the fluids in our body and fats, fibres, proteins, vitamins and minerals all play very specific roles in the ecosystem that is our body. Aerobic exercise builds up stamina and anaerobic exercise builds muscles and our body becomes in good working order, if we regularly exercise in both of these ways. This does not mean that we have to run a marathon every day or lift crazy amounts of weights, we should start at our level and build up from their. I would recommend following the advice of a trained fitness instructor to ensure you do not injure yourself.
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Energy Health
Energy health is also equally important. Our energy health can be maintained by practising Chi Kung (or Qigong) and/or Tai Chi and/or physical Yoga. These Eastern practices allow the Chi in our bodies to be healthy and to flow. Chi, like the water in a river, needs to keep flowing,  as well as be of good quality and quantity for us to remain healthy. If water is stuck on one place it becomes stagnant, our Chi is the same. Often people will go to see an Acupuncturist to keep their meridians in working order to keep the Chi optimised for good health. Daily practice of Chi Kung, Tai Chi and physical Yoga are also excellent ways to keep our energy systems flowing and functioning at their best, which contributes to our overall good health.
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Keeping ourselves in good health means that we have to cultivate the habits and actions that boost and balance our health in all of these three areas, mental and emotional health, physical health and energy health, none of them should be neglected. The Good Health Triad is such a foundational part of our happiness and success it now has it’s place as part of the Fullfilment Framework Foundation.
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Resources 
               by Christopher Hansard
               by Susannah Steel
               by Kenneth S. Cohen

Mini Reflection-Talking yourself into it

Mini Reflections, The Fullfilment Framework

Many of us have ambitions to do certain things, big dreams, or even medium sized dreams, but there is often a little voice inside out heads that whispers discouraging words. Suggesting that we are not qualified enough, we are not clever enough or that we will likely fail so what is the point in trying. Learning to control our inner dialogue is one of the most important things we can do, because our brains have evolved to talk us out of things that could be dangerous or life threatening and in our modern day world the brain still reacts in the same way to any bit of anxiety we have. Recognising when our primitive brains are hijacking our decision making abilities is the first step. Then we need to engage in positive self talk; “I am capable”, “I am courageous”, “I will achieve my ambitions one step at a time.” Thirdly we have to take positive daily actions towards completing our ambitions.

However, before we get started on talking ourselves into doing any old thing that makes us feel anxious, we first have to know ourselves really well, this is part of what I call the Foundation in the Fullfilment Framework. We need to know if an ambition is true to our core values and beliefs, because if it is not it will not bring the desired happiness or success if we achieve. We have to know ourselves and then control ourselves to achieve our true ambitions.

– Fullfilment Project