Responsibility – The Fullfilment Project

Responsibility Is A Privilege

This title could be taken a number of ways. Let me explain my meaning. Often in life we see responsibility as a burden, something that we avoid, either because we don’t want to have to devote our time to it or because we already have a lot of responsibility and we would struggle to fit in more.

In either case, the way we see responsibility can either leave us feeling stressed or excited. If we see responsibility as a privilege then we will see it as something we have earned and are capable of. We will feel more confident and able to fulfill the needs of the responsibility.

Essentially, seeing a responsibility as a privilege naturally brings out excitement and makes us want to work to prove we have earned it. It is a completely different mindset, a mindset that can make the work you do more fulfilling. However, we must be mindful of taking on too much responsibility. There are only 24 hours in a day and we all have a limit to the energy we can spend each day. So be selective with the responsibilities you take on too.

Taking Responsibility

Leadership, Success, The Pathway To Fulfilment

This week Conservative MP David Davis stood up in Parliament and commented on how Prime Minister Boris Johnson has not shouldered the responsibility for the actions he has taken and that he should go.

I am not going to get into a discussion about what the UK Prime Minister should or should not have done, but the point David Davis made applies to us all. He meant it to be something leaders do, but we are all leader in some capacity.

When we make mistakes or make errors in judgement, the right thing to do is to take responsibility for them having happened and to fix them, in whatever way we can.

It is a measure of our integrity that we act ethically, even when no one is watching.

The art of listening

Happiness

I have often heard the saying that we have one mouth and two ears, so we should spend twice as long listening than we do talking. Which often gets a smile, but I believe that this deceptively simple idea actually has a deep meaning. If we followed this advice we would know more about each other and therefore would judge each other less, because knowing someone’s personal circumstances can help us better understand what they do and what they say. It also encourages us to build bridges between ourselves and others, rather than separating ourselves in an attempt at self preservation.

Listening well is a skill. There have been times when my mind has started to wander when someone was talking to me. I started thinking about the things I was going to do that day or things that were causing stress in my life at that time. I was not listening to what was being said. There have also been times when I was not listening because I was waiting for a gap to say what I wanted to say. We have all done these things, part of being human is making such self centred mistakes (occasionally). The aim is to notice that we are doing these things so we can make positive changes, but we have to be self confident enough to analyse our behaviour and adjust it for the better.

The more I have reflected on the importance of listening the more I have come to see listening as a gift; it is never about you and it is always about the person speaking. The gift of listening well to others is that they feel listened to, that they count and somebody cares enough to want to know what they have to say. Sometimes this is because they are going through a tough time and they don’t want answers, they just need someone to listen.

Sometimes listening well allows you to make appropriate suggestions that can help the person talking. The art is not only to listen well, but also to know when is the right time to comment or give advice and when you should just listen. It is an art because it is hard to get right. It takes practice, for some more than others and that is OK.

The benefit of listening also means that you learn new things. You can learn from every person you meet if you listen to them. When you listen you receive. When you talk this can’t happen. Let us all try to listen more and talk less.

Have you ever successfully helped someone by listening to them?

Taking responsibility

Happiness, Success

Taking responsibility for the things you have control of in your life can bring immense rewards, the most important of which is that you will move away from feeling like you are a victim in areas or situations in your life. When we feel that our lives are mainly subject to forces outside of our control we feel like victims. A similar mindset allows us to blame these outside forces, or even other people, when things don’t go our way.

Outside forces and people will have their influence over us at times, when it rains and we are standing outside we will get wet, but the degree to which we stand there is the degree to which we get wet. At all times we can decide to take acton to improve things or we can decide to view a situation in a positive light and look for the opportunities. This boils down to taking responsibility for what we do, what we say and most importantly what we think. We cannot control everything but we can control how we respond to the events and situations in our lives.

A word of warning however, do not mistake taking responsibility for blaming yourself. If you made a mistake it can be easy to beat yourself up about it. Whatever we do it will never be perfect. Our lives will always be a work in progress. Embrace this and treat life as a great adventure with every mistake being an opportunity to learn and every challenge an opportunity to either succeed or learn how to.

This is taking responsibility for your life, the fruit of which will be a greater feeling of control in your life and greater opportunities. You will be able to see more opportunities, because you will be looking for them and others will see that you take responsibility, that you are accountable for your actions, and they will give you opportunities. The greatest payoff however will be that you will be happier while you have more control over your life, because you have control of yourself. This is the most important mastery you can achieve.